No Name Poem,Read and tell me what you think!Pretty Please!~?
I swing and slide
Beaten by barks of wood
On the leafs of the mulberry tree
And the bruises that bruise
Always come to me in pleasure
As long as I am given the the best of good,
You.
In the dawn
When the sun is barely beaming
All that is felt is the scissors of the dark.
The flesh of the wolf and their eyes that suave the knifes
Eyes of tender beans with yellow lights
Silver platted teeth in front of their throats
The opposite scent of the beast
assured me into the broken chants.
Between the echoes and the tingling noises
I fell underneath the doomed trunk.
Her ribbons of disgrace embraced me all around.
The glass that slipped in my palms cut the figure of the supreme,and in an instant moment of solitary death,I remembered the glory of being on top.
You,always on top,and I slid on my own.
Good! You use plenty of imagery. your point, though was rough to capture in the middle. It keeps the reader guessing and occupied while the inevitable end which explains all of the imagery.
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